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2017 THE GATELY’S YEAR OF MID LIFE CHANGES
Our year has been filled with many changes, especially for me. Which all started the day after I paid off our newer home’s 30 year mortgage in just 7 years. That day shall be referred to as “D-Day” February 9th, 2017.
2017 started out OK so I thought. We all had a good 2016 Christmas, in fact I broke all the Christmas giving rules on a suggestion from a work colleague Gary “Awesome” S. I bought my honey Ann jewelry something I have NEVER done before in our 27+ year relationship. 1/2 carat diamond earnings. Ann liked them way better than last years Clapping Monkey and the previous years Clothes and House Appliance gifts. But to my surprise it did not top the “tears of joy” from the year I gave Ann, Sky Diving lessons. But still I thought it went “K”... Next we had our first Emily-less New Years Eve party. It was the first time we let Emily out on NYE. So the 3 – 4 of us (Ann, Greg, Dayton + Paul) toasted in 2017 from the usual basement game - wreck room. The rest of January went o”K” Me, Ann & Dayton went up to our Wisconsin Cottage and played in the snow for a weekend; on our Polaris Sportsman 600 4X4 ATV and Yamaha Sno-Scoot. Then February rolled around and one day Ann just totally SNAPPED!...
Ann’s moms side of her family has this multi generational hereditary illness, I refer to as The Johnson Family Curse. I first became aware of TJFC when Ann and I started dating. The first dark family secret Ann shared, was how bad her teen years were because mother Phyllis one day SNAPPED! Phyllis started crying was depressed all the time and wanted to Divorce her father Andy. It got so bad, Ann didn't want to be home. After a few doctor visits it was determined that Phyllis was going through that woman hormone chemical imbalance commonly referred to as Mid Life Change. Ann said they prescribed Valium and life immediately returned to kind of normal. Andy however says Phyllis never took Valium, maybe Prozac. Who to believe? I say Prozac or Valium no difference. If a happy drug is what mom Phyllis now needs to keep her mind in check, than do it. So now a few more years go by and I learn another dark fam secret. This time it’s about Grandma Johnson when she went through MLC and cheated on Grandpa Lenard with a younger man. Now a few years later I’m seeing the TJFC play out live. When Phyllis’s youngest sister Debbie goes through her version of MLC. Debbie cheats on husband Jim. Throws her own mother Grandma Johnson out of her own home. Divorces Jim. Sells Grandmas house and moves to Florida with all her sisters $600K in inheritance money. But Karma bites sister Debbie in the butt. When her hunk boyfriend Rod, losses all her $600K, due to a gambling addiction.
So now I guess it’s our MLC turn. My best friend Ann turned 47 this year. This new Ann has changed a lot. Ann’s Gotten very paranoid thinks she being watched and stalked all the time. It feels so real to her that she’s now afraid of all our homes security cameras, disconnected her cell phones GPS locator function and car’s Dash Cam too. She’s more stressed out has a short fuse temper. Ann has the UNs, she lately acts totally UN-REASONABLE, UN-RATIONABLE, and UN-COOPERATIVE! NOT the easy going caring logical Ann I married and knew. She’s much more critical of people now before she’d cut them some slack. For the first time she got upset about the election when D. Trump won. This really bothered her which was weird because Ann normally could care less about politics. She also had a work issue. Wanted a raise and did research to support it, only to be turned down. That really hurt Ann. Ann Lies to me all the time now, something Ann NEVER did in our past. Me being so close to Ann I did not realize that these issues had been going on for a while now. I figured Ann was just getting crankier with age, like we all have. But after discussing our pending Divorce with others we’ve been around these past few years, they all said they had noticed major changes in Ann’s personality dating back to the mid 2016s.
Now Ann’s version will tell a tale of how she’s been trapped in a BAD MENTALLY ABUSEIVE 27 year relationship; and stories of creepy home security cameras, some installed over 10 years ago. She also now complains of a list of things I did wrong. There’s not enough room to list them all so I’ll just pick my favorites. 1) I buy GRAPES at the wrong store, Aldi’s. 2) Mornings I’m always in the bathroom, shower at the wrong time. We do have three bathrooms w/showers. 3) Stingy with the house money after paying bills. That’s me. 4) Made to much noise getting into bed. 5) When traveling don’t stop enough, like every 30 minutes or less to go potty. 6) Chased all Ann’s childhood and work MOT friends away… Her list goes on. But wait a darn minuet, don’t I get a “B’tch” list too? How about when I find 1) Makeup & Mascara all over the bathroom sink each morning, 2) Red stained pads on top of the bathroom garbage can!! 3) Ann waking me up ten times a night when she goes to pee. 4) The funny nose noises she makes sleeping while I’m trying to go back to sleep after she just peed. Aren't these issues MENTAL ABUSE too? So I guess this Mental Abuse is a two way street? Or maybe we’re just talking about the give and take in a working relationship called MARRIAGE! But Ann’s busted brain doesn't see it that way anymore. Ann’s mind is re-living, fixating on just our BAD past and blocking out all our good times. It’s scary how she can recall with great detail, 20+ years back an argument or some un-pleasantries, I don’t remember at all. If Ann truly felt trapped in our relationship why would |